To-do-lists, Judgement and Alignment

to-do-list

Yesterday was one of these days when I was not happy with myself. I had grand plans for what to accomplish during the day. But unfortunately, in the early afternoon, I refused to obey and started to watch TV instead. Blind to all to-do-lists.

In the evening I reflected on my day, and my life, and asked why it’s so hard to make myself do what I think I should do. The answer came almost immediately; I’m judging myself all the time, whatever I do, it’s not enough. I don’t measure up to what I expect of myself, I lose energy, I try to push myself for a while, and then I run away into some distraction.

This Sunday was no exception, and I know I’m not alone in this behaviour. This is how we live our modern lives, pushing and judging, planning for the future and condemning that we didn’t achieve everything. Reducing the present moment to a spot where we check off items from The List. Working hard so the future will be without guilt. But that will never happen, the list is filling itself up all the time. And the harder I judge me, the harder I judge others. Why should I not?

 

There is a side of me that exists only now, unconditionally. It’s the Embrace of me. I can lean out into that Embrace and hold this human being, with all her struggles and shortcomings. I rest in the Embrace of me, relaxing and getting nurtured.

The Embrace of me is holding the conditional me, unconditionally.
The Embrace of me being outside time, I’m acting inside time.
Together we are a complete team.

To let go of the Plans and the Judging feels like taking off an old winter coat.
It’s scary, and I’m afraid of becoming naked and vulnerable.
Who is going to steer me if the To-Do-List don’t?
Who is going to make me work if the Future doesn’t judge me?
How will Time move forward if I don’t fill it with meaningless escape?

It’s not about living in the now, not caring about tomorrow.
It’s about being informed by that which is outside time.
And by that which is inside time.
Aligning myself with all my wider Embraces.
Letting action arise in this human being.

 

I did check my to-do-list this morning, and one thing had to be done today, so I marked that one; calling my dad on his birthday. Then I started my day doing things when they arose. Being still now and then. And guess what, this was a very productive and happy day!

No fighting with myself.

2018-07-30 by Stina Deurell

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Flowing Again

Time for Wider Embraces to flow out into the world again. This website will, bit by bit, be filled with resources:

  • Guided Embraces – experience the Wider Embraces yourself.
  • Online events where we take collective perspectives together.
  • Blog posts with ideas and theories around belonging, relating, consciousness, perspectives and much more.

It has now been five years of exploration, guided by the question “Who is Embracing?”. Every time I think I got what this is about, there is a new turn, a new insight.

In March this year, I was sure we had it all set, we were a dedicated group of friends and a well-developed method to present. So we invited a circle of friends. In May, a new insight struck – It has to be clear that Wider Embraces is more than a method, it has implications that may challenge your worldview. And at its core, it is about the relationship between Humanity and the Biosphere.

This new turn made it necessary to reorganise, again. Close down some parts and open to new possibilities and you, who read this, have the opportunity to join and be part of the future development.

Flowing again

At this turning point in the life of the Wider Embraces Project, it’s time to honour everyone who has contributed.  The ones who have been part of exploring the Embraces and developing the method from scratch. I’m especially thinking of the beautiful, playful group of ladies in Höör and my circle of integral friends from around Sweden. Every one of you has contributed in so many ways, with heart and mind, with your knowledge and time. Without you, the Wider Embraces would not be.

Now it’s time to take the next step together, old and new friends, inside all our wider Embraces!

2017-09-14 by Stina Deurell

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